Thursday, February 21, 2013

Heros Take Action!

 The other day, my son and I had an unplanned adventure.  We were on our way to his therapy like every other Monday evening, but this evening we had company going for a ride with us, and some errands to run after his session.  I normally do not have a list of things to do after his therapy because many times, this is an overload for him and he usually has a meltdown, but the things we needed were neccessities and I was feeling pretty positive that we were going to have a great night!
 
...And we did, well sort of.  The evening started out great.  My son fell asleep in the car before I picked up my friend and her son.  I was a little worried about them riding in the car with us, since this would be a change and her son would be riding in the "baby's" carseat.  I knew with him being asleep and just waking up to it would be much better.  For him, if he wakes up to something new, its better.  If it happens in front of him, or he witnesses the change, all bets are off.  So, obstacle one, new people in car...done!  Next was his therapy. 
 
He cried!  I mean balled when we went into therapy.  It was a new group therapy session so new faces to see, new people to meet, new voices, and everything else that goes with the change.  He clung to me as he was going into the session room screaming and crying "Mommie don't make me go!"  "Mommie, please don't leave me!"  "Mommie, Mommie, NO!!"  Can you say, break your heart?!?  Because it broke mine.  I looked at the therapist, who gave me the aproving nod, and I bolted out of the room, hearing him crying in the background.  I could hear him crying as I left the building to tell my friend to run to the first store without me that I was going to wait there because my aspie wasn't doing so well.  I could still hear him crying for me when I got back into the waiting room and for the next half hour I sat there waiting.  (It was an hour session, by the way.)  The only way I didn't run into the room and grab him was through texting my husband and him saying to me that this is for his own good, we have to do this, blah, blah blah, blah blah.  And yes, he was right.  But at that moment, I kept thinking to myself.  So what if we never leave the house with him.  Who cares if he lives with us for the rest of his life because he doesn't like other people.  He will be happy, right?  But that was my mommy heart trying to make my brain run in and rescue him, when I know therapy is the best for him and its better he learns social skills now, than at 20, 30, or 40.  I felt better when I couldn't hear him crying after about 35 minutes, and when the hour was finally over, he was the first to bolt out the door looking for me!  And there he was, with a huge smile on his face saying, "Mommie, I did all my work!"  "All right baby!"  I said and got a fast report from his therapist because my son was dragging me out the door. 
 
I didn't have a chance to tell him that his friend was in the car because he was dragging me to the car to quickly and I was trying to slow him down.  So when I opened the door, he was pleasantly surprised to see my friend's son.  I loaded him into his seat, when her son said, "We have lolipops!"  And that was it my son was sold.  Bring on the lolipops and bring on the adventure!
 
We drove to the next store with two toddlers in silence busily eating.  When we go to the store, I have to admit I was a little scared given our past history with new places, but out of the car my aspie went and into the store like he does it everyday.  He got into the cart and was yelling out things he saw with excitment!  What in the world, I thought with delight.  What happened to my son who hides in strange places?  I was not complaining, but just in disbelief.  I looked at my friend who smiled with the look of, don't question it just go with it.  So we shopped around, got the kids some treats and headed back to the car, with one proud mommie and one happy toddler. 
 
As we drove to drop off our guests, my friend and I were chatting about how great my aspie did.  We both wondered if it was the lack of people in the store.  There were only two to three other people in a very small and quaint store and the store was very quiet.  Maybe that was what did it, who knows, but he did an excellent job, which I continuously told him the whole ride home! 
 
After dropping them off with happy goodbyes, I had one more stop to make...of course, Walmart.  We needed some can not live without items, like toilet paper, almond milk and cuties so into the store we went. As soon as we went in, I knew from the moment we went inside my son was scared.  He held his head down, was squeezing my hand, and bumping into me a lot.  Oh crap, I pushed him to far I thought, but we were already in the store and so I pushed on.  We headed back to the trains since I promised him one earlier, unfortunately, there were many employees around re-stocking the shelves, which made my little man extra nervous.  He couldn't concentrate on the trains.  He couldn't stand still long enough to look, and kept running up the isle which is something he never does while looking for a train.  We walked away for a little while and stumbled upon these Avenger Superhero masks.  I put the blue Captain America one on and looked at my son, who thought it was so funny.  He asked for the Hulk mask and I helped him put it on.  He decided that he could scare people and went walking off.  As I started to grab for him, he stopped and said, "Wait, its not Halloween, we can't wear these!"  I then had to explain to my smart little man that we can play dress up anytime, just like when we wear our Jake and the Neverland Pirates costume at home, or the Buzz Lightyear costuem.  Masks are the same thing.  It must of worked because he put his mask back on.  He walked by two employees no problem thinking he was scaring them as he walked.  When we got by, he took his mask down and said, "I really scared them mommie!"  "Yes, you did buddy that was fun!"  And then an idea flew into my funnel.  (That's for all you parents out there who have watched as much of Thomas the Tank Engine shows as I have!)  I told my son that it would be fun to wear the masks the whole time we were in the store to scare everyone.  Since scaring meant wearing the mask and walking by the person, I figured no harm could be done.  My son was so excited he couldn't wait.  He put on his mask and off we went.  He went back to the trains, grabbed the one he wanted and we continued to shop, masks and all.  Apparantly, he felt safe in the mask, because noone was looking at him.  They were looking at the scary mask.  And to him, finally, he was not as scared as they were of him.  Little did he know that we probably got more stares from wearing the masks, but what he doesn't know will not hurt him. 
 
And so mommie and the Hulk finished shopping, checked out, and yes, even the clerk, thank god played along scanned the mask while my son was still wearing it and out the store we went.  On the way home, my son was laughing at how we were going to scare daddy with our newly acquire masks, and I drove home happily, still in my Captain America mask, thinking to myself that there was nothing I wouldn't do for my little man, which includes shopping in a mask everytime if it makes my son happy!
 
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